Some thoughts on our class

A new day is upon us.  Gateway is entering a brand new phase of her life.  The same is true of our adult Sunday school class.   For the last year we’ve been working through Dr.  Paul Tripp’s book on Psalm 51, “Whiter Than Snow”.  This class has been a joy for me.  Of the 50 lesson’s I’ve been through, I probably hated 15 of them.  There were 15 or 20 I had no opinion on and 15 I really liked.  This is probably not much different than any other book I would have read during that time.  However I do have a few thoughts on the class and for Julia and I, a surprise ending!

One of the things I’ve enjoyed about the class is the open exchange of ideas and personal experiences.  The class has followed in the tradition established by Peggy Jo and Frieda.  A tradition of honesty and openness.  Tom’s leadership of this class has been honest and open and with Tom’s own brand of teaching skill’s displayed weekly.  I want to thank him for his faithfulness over the last year in leading our class.

There have been moments of great levity in class.  Many of those moments seem to be traced back to Leland for some reason.  Leland  brings to the class the critical eye of a communications professional along with a marvelous sense of humor.  I smile as I write this thinking of some of his comments.  Thanks Leland for your help in spicing up the class!

Evelyn brings to class the wisdom of years of following Christ.  Her insights and prayers were so refreshing.   Thanks Evelyn.

Each week I would look forward to Gene and Marion’s contributions.  Again, wisdom and experience personified.  Their lightness and sharp commentary have given me pause for deep thought on more than one occasion. 

As our elder statesman, Roque keeps us on our toes.  One of the things I like about Roque is he simply throws it out there and lets us deal with his comments and ideas.  He brings perfect blend of wisdom, humor and a life long perspective that have added to the class a wealth of knowledge.  Thanks Roque!

One of the more memorable classes was the time Hope and Missy shared about their efforts to save their good friend David from the electric chair.  I can close my eyes and see again as I sat there transfixed on Hope as she bared her soul to us with pain and anguish over her mistakes in life and her and Missy’s efforts to fight for David’s life.  Then the joy of victory as 2 hours before his execution, he was spared.  Thank you Lord Jesus and thank you Hope and Missy!

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Beverly’s contributions to the class.  Her insights are special to me.  Her ability in hearing God in dreams and her writing skills have added to the class innumerable times.  I get tickled as I sit here thinking about the times Leland has spoken on a given subject and I watch as Beverly watches him with a sparkle in her eye and a big grin on her face as she waits until he’s done and then laughs out loud or adds to the mix some witty insight or some deep truth.  Her voice will be missed in our class as she and Jerry move on to the  next phase of their life in Christ!  Thanks a million Bev!

Lest I forget any one person, I thank  everyone in class for their faithful attendance  and the contributions each has made.  Cynthia reading her letter to God was special.  Claire’s comments and freshness of heart have been  greatly appreciated.  I guess I just  say, thanks to everyone in class!

One last note I wanted to share that truly caught Julia and I off guard yesterday.  We are on vacation in Hilton Head and for the last 20 years, we’ve been coming to one particular church on the island, Central Church lead by Pastor Michael Carr.  Michael knows who we are even though we only come to his Church once a year in June.  Yet we have come to think of Central Church as a place we belong.  Michael Carr is a great speaker and teacher and in Julia’s and my life, he is one of the three best speaker and teacher’s we’ve had.  We’ve been so blessed to have had Richard Exley, Jerry Varnado and Michael Carr as men we can call Pastor’s and friends.   As Julia and I were coming down to the island, just before I was pulled over by a Rockland police officer for speeding, I was contemplating the changes upcoming in our life at church.  I was thinking to the Lord that I would love to have Michael Carr pray for Jerry and Bev and for Gateway.  I know how the services go, and they don’t have a time in prayer at the front of the church as we do at Gateway, but I was just thinking how good it would be if Michael could pray for us.  Now in the last 20 years, I’ve never run into Michael at any time any place other than the church.  Saturday night Julia and I were walking on the beach and she stops and say’s “There is Pastor Carr”.  Sure enough Michael was there and he took time to hear our request.  He shared his insights with us and promised he would pray with us Sunday morning.  He did exactly as he promised and as he prayed for us, there was a tremendous sense of God’s presence and power.

But the most interesting part of the service was Michael’s sermon.   He is doing a series on Living on the Edge and he spoke on the Marriage of Michal and David in 1st Samuel 18.  He gave us a perspective on David I had not heard before.  He spoke of the problems David encountered with Bathsheeba were a direct result of the breakdown in communications in his marriage with Michal.  Julia and I were both impressed with the sermon, and with the passion it was delivered and the truth it held.  I will make sure the link to this sermon is available to everyone as soon as it is posted.  It will give you a perspective on Psalm 51 that I had not seen until yesterday.  In my opinion, this is the perfect ending to a wonderful Bible study!

And now, in the words of the great American Hero, Buzz Lightyear, “To infinity and beyond!!!!”

A change in focus

Joshua 1:1-7 Net Bible

After Moses the Lord’s servant died, the Lord said to Joshua son of Nun, Moses’ assistant: “Moses my servant is dead. Get ready! Cross the Jordan River!  Lead these people into the land which I am ready to hand over to them. I am handing over to you every place you set foot, as I promised Moses. Your territory will extend from the wilderness in the south to Lebanon in the north. It will extend all the way to the great River Euphrates in the east (including all of Syria) and all the way to the Mediterranean Sea in the west.

Gateway is undergoing a change in leadership.  We have been lead by a dynamic man of God for 25 years.  Now we have a new leader, Pastor Joseph and Becky Dye.  Friday night June 4th the PPR committee met with them at Alton and Frieda's home.  The Holy Spirit showed up big time!  Joseph and Becky shared their hopes and dreams and members of the committee shared with them their thoughts.  It is truly and answer to prayer about how they were chosen for the job and I will let Joseph share that publicly.  It’s just a marvelous “God thing”.

We prayed for the church.  We prayed for Jerry and Beverly as they also enter uncharted waters.  It’s exciting and yet its sad.  We’ve never done this before.  Yet we enter with confidence in the future knowing that God is in control of the life of our congregation, Joseph and Becky and their family as well as Jerry and Beverly and their family.

I must admit to a severe case of cognitive dissonance.  I walked today, listening to music and talking to God about everything going on at Gateway.  I am thrilled beyond words at what I sense is in the future for us.  I am scared because my good friend and pastor will be doing something else.  I’m excited about Joseph and Becky.  They are such a great fit for us at Gateway.  (He even seems to get along ok with Tom).  I am scared because Jerry doesn’t have a job.  Is it possible to have elation and despair at the same time?  Yes it is!  As I was walking I sensed the Lord walking with me and starting to show me some things.

Alton mentioned to me as we were leaving Friday that this seemed like God handing the ball off to Joshua.  As I thought about that I believe the Lord confirmed that.  God is very proud of Jerry and the work he’s done at Gateway.  I believe Jerry is the only man that could have lead this church through the rough and stormy waters we’ve been through.  It’s not about size and numbers.  Quite the opposite, it is about loyalty and obedience.  Jerry has been loyal and obedient.  But now as a church we must change focus.  We must move out of the survival mode into the taking the land promised to us mode.  Joseph is the man God has chosen to take this church into the promised land.  It’s as if God is saying to Joseph:

“Jerry my servant is gone, now therefore you go and lead this church to take the land I promised to them.  Be strong and courageous, and do not be afraid.  I repeat, be strong and brave! Don’t be afraid and don’t panic, for I, the Lord your God, am with you in all you do.”

I write this with the conviction that we need to do what Joshua told the people, “Prepare your supplies, for within three days you will cross the Jordan River and begin the conquest of the land the Lord your God is ready to hand over to you.”  That means Athens and the surrounding communities.

Get ready Gateway!  There are going to be times when we will be tempted to be afraid and will need courage.  We will need to hang on to God and each other, but we are ready to conquer the land.

Lord: Thank you for your faithfulness.  Thank you for sending us Joseph and Becky and their family.  Thank you for taking care of Jerry and Beverly and Aaron and Bethany.  Give us all strength and courage to get through the next three weeks.  Give Joseph and Becky the wisdom to say what you want them to say as they prepare to come to Gateway.  Give Jerry and Beverly courage and faith to know you will take care of all their needs according to your riches in glory in Christ Jesus!

The sermon on the mount – week 43

The last couple of weeks have been very busy. Issues at work are becoming more and more intense. I can’t seem to place them in the proper perspective. Gateway is undergoing monumental changes. Our family has had two surgeries and (to put it bluntly) I’m a bit frazzled. Blogging has not been on my radar screen. This week, I’m back however.

I couldn’t disagree with Dr. Tripp any more than I do this week.

”You and I will only ever be holy by God’s definition if we put the moral fences where God puts them.”

“… A lustful heart craves the actual experience and will only be satisfied when it experiences the thing for which it lusts.”

Let’s deal with the fence issue. As soon as you attempt to put a fence around your heart for any reason two things happen (at least they did to me). The first thing is my heart starts to sing “don’t fence me in ….” Then I notice the fence isn’t secure enough and so I start to add to it and before you know it, my fence is a wall. Wall’s get me in trouble. I don’t’ want walls anymore. I’m doing everything I can at this point in my life to remove my walls, not start them under a different name. If I have a problem with a particular behavior, setting limits on the behavior doesn’t work for me and I’ve been to enough 12 step meetings to know it doesn’t work for anyone else either. At least it doesn’t work as the hedge everyone hopes it will. Clearly boundaries need to be set in our lives; I’m not saying they shouldn’t be. What I am saying is setting a boundary won’t stop the problem.

The second thing there is nothing in my experience or anything I’ve ever read that gives me the slightest confidence of ever being satisfied with anything lustful. I speak from a vast array of experiences on this subject. I’m what they call a “SME” (subject matter expert). It simply doesn’t work that way. Before we go farther on this subject, I would like to deal with the definition of the word lust as I was taught it. Lust is pressure on the five physical senses. While it certainly could be sexual in nature (what most people think of) it can apply to other areas as well. That is the working definition I use.

One final thought on this week. I don’t think there is any evidence that fencing your heart works as Dr. Tripp seems to be describing it. You have to win the battle of the mind. That is where the action is, in your mind. Romans 8:5-6 places great emphasis on this.

For those who are according to the flesh {and} are controlled by its unholy desires set their minds on {and} pursue those things which gratify the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit {and} are controlled by the desires of the Spirit set their minds on {and} seek those things which gratify the [Holy] Spirit. Now the mind of the flesh [which is sense and reason without the Holy Spirit] is death [death that comprises all the miseries arising from sin, both here and hereafter]. But the mind of the [Holy] Spirit is life and [soul] peace [both now and forever].

This is Waterloo, Stalingrad, Gettysburg and D-Day all wrapped up in one. All the chips lay on this. If you can win the battle of the mind, you can win the day to day battles. I call this process “Blue Water Theology”. If you have a glass of blue water and you want it to become clear, you have to pour in enough clear water so that over time, the blue water fades and becomes less and less dominating. That’s the only way you can over come it. Of course, if you keep filling the glass with blue water, then it becomes bluer and never really has a chance to clear up.

Lord: Please help me to focus my mind and thoughts on your thoughts. Help me to become aware of evil as I contemplate it and to reject as soon as I recognize it.

Heart of Stone

The subject of a hard heart is one I know about. The heart of stone is something I’ve struggled with all of my adult life. How does one go about breaking down a heart of stone?

In 1998 Benji Clark Mallory spoke at our church and gave everyone in the congregation a specific word from the Lord. It was a one in a lifetime experience for me. Here was a women I knew nothing about. She stood in front of me, looked me in the eye and began to “read my mail”. She spoke as if she had known me all my life. One of the things she spoke of was a hard heart. “God has given you a caring heart. You are compassionate and loving.” While Benji spoke of other things, this one thing has been a focal point for me over the years.

How does a heart of stone manifest itself in a person? In my case it was several areas. One area was for those who were less fortunate than I was. I would give money to causes but I had a rather superior attitude towards those who were unable to do the things I could do. This was especially true with homeless people. I had no use for people who would hold signs that say “will work for food.” They wouldn’t work for food, I tried to get them jobs but they wouldn’t take them. So I blew them off whenever they approached me.

A hard heart is an attitude that permeates everything you do. There is no compassion at work. If you were assigned a task and failed, you failed. There is no gray area. You either did or you didn’t. There were no excuses. Sports was the same way. You either won or you didn’t. There is no gray area. I took this attitude into my personal relationships. I had no tolerance for people and their foibles. I was not a nice person. I have no clue how or why my wife has stayed with me for as long as she has. As I look back, I was an intolerant person that was a bear to be around most of the time.

People that struggled with addictions was another place I was very critical. Personal relationships was another sore point for me. I was always ready to blow people off at a drop of the hat. “Well get over it” I would say when people had a problem they couldn’t deal with.

One area that was particularly difficult for me was children. I had no use for them. I didn’t like them, want them or want to be around them. I had no use for children. The where and why’s of this particular issue are being dealt with even as we speak (thank God for Angel Davis). Let’s just say my hard heart had no place for children.

I don’t know when I noticed a personal change. Benji announced it to the world before I knew anything about it. I guess it was like God calling things that are not as though they are. I think it began with a young girl I met at church. She took a liking to me. I suppose she was 10 or somewhere in that age range. She actually seemed to like me. At any rate, I guess you could say I was “smitten” by this little girl. I spent time at church with her and even began going to church functions with her. Then one day, poof she was gone and that was the end of the relationship. I didn’t let on like it was a big deal, but it was. I began to feel things I certainly never felt before. Old habits die hard though and I quickly shut the door of my heart again.

Then the Lord brought my sister into my life. More chunks of the hard heart began to fall off. I think the real turning point for me though was the day in Sunday school I met Michelle and Red Headed Becky!!!! Michelle didn’t stay around as long as Becky did but the impact she had on my life was unbelievable. Michelle came from a more “liberal” persuasion than I did. She made some comments in class that intrigued me. I asked her about it after class and she told me to read a book “Blue Like Jazz”. I did and it changed my life. I began to question many of my long held, hard right political beliefs. I began to see things differently. I saw that God didn’t necessarily run ideas by the GOP or Rush Limbaugh before he implemented them.

President Obama's election was another major turning point for me. I was sitting at the counter in the lobby of the Hilton Garden Inn in Gulfport watching the TV. CNN was on and there was a lady there who was shall we say “toasting” the democratic victory. I engaged her in conversation when I mentioned to her I was a conservative. Her whole attitude changed and in a flash I saw that I needed to quit with the political identification. I am conservative and I vote conservative but I no longer wear the political mantle of conservative GOP. I found out it is too divisive

I take Benji at her word. I do have a caring and compassionate heart. It’s just taken time to manifest itself.

Lord: If there is any of your tribe that needs a heart of compassion, it’s me. Help me to be like Jesus. When there are times I don’t see things properly, provide me another Michelle that can put me on the right track!

Enough already ….

The dictionary definition of enough is:  "as much or as many as necessary, desirable, or tolerable; sufficient".

This week the author talks about enough.  What is enough?  In my book, there are two uses for the word:

The first usage is:  I've had enough.  Don't want no more, nada,  nyet,  nine .... nuff  is nuff.  When used in this manner, I think of politics.  I've had enough.
The second usage is:  I can't get enough.  I want more.  I don't need more, but I want more.  When used in this manner, I think of Cynthia's  pork roast at the church dinners.

When I apply this to David I can see both usages very clearly.  I don't know what David thought  of but I'm going to jump into  his shoes for a moment and place myself  in his situation and tell you what I see.

I've had enough guilt.  I can't take any more.

I've had  enough lying and deceit.  I've killed a man to  cover up my crime.  Not  good Andy.   I've had enough.

I've  had enough sex.  A man can only do so  much.  Why is this such an issue?  I can have as many women as I want when I want  them.  It isn't working though.  Why?  Enough already.

I've had enough of feeling like dirt.  I hate feeling like dirt, but I do.

As I think about his situation these are the  thoughts I believe I would struggle with.  However, David does something I haven't done and quite frankly have trouble doing.  David goes to God WITH CONFIDENCE.  I go to God, but not with the confidence David does.  Listen to what He says in Psalm 27:5-8:

He will surely give me shelter in the day of danger; he will hide me in his home; he will place me on an inaccessible rocky summit.  Now I will triumph over my enemies who surround me!  I will offer sacrifices in his dwelling place and shout for joy!  I will sing praises to the Lord!  Hear me, O Lord, when I cry out!  Have mercy on me and answer me!  My heart tells me to pray to you, and I do pray to you, O Lord.

I tend to give up where David pressed on.  Hebrews 10:39 in the Message:  But we're not quitters who lose out. Oh, no! We'll stay with it and survive, trusting all the way.  God said David was a man after his own heart.  Perhaps that was because David didn't quit, not because he got it right all the time.

Lord:  I'm right up there with David.  "I am the Man".  Help  me to turn to you for help  in a time of trouble.   Help me to trust in what you've done not what I have or haven't done.  I've had enough running and being scared of you.  I haven't had enough of your grace, love and mercy.  Help me to press on when I don't want to.  Help me Lord to walk with you when it looks like I can't go on.

Building Walls ….

I am in the middle of a difficult business trip.  I am working and training with a new colleague that will be taking over the western region.  I haven't had as much time as I wanted to read and think through the weeks lesson.  But the lesson this week is on walls.  Actually the subject is building walls.

Walls can do several things for you.

1. It can keep people out, providing protection from your enemies.
2. It can keep you in, trapping you in a prison.
3. It can integrate into your life as a part of the living structure you occupy providing support, protection and beauty if it is built properly.

When I think of Psalm 51 and the story of David and Bathsheba, I don't usually think of walls.  I think of open spaces, places where there were no walls.  Bathsheba wasn't behind a wall or David wouldn't have seen her.  David wasn't behind a wall or he wouldn't have known she was bathing.  Yet it's clear a wall developed that blocked David from seeing the impact of what he was doing on his relationship to God and others.

I started thinking about the walls I've built in my life.  With the wisdom my years provide me, I picture myself sitting in a courtyard looking around and seeing the edifices of my life and taking stock of the situation.  Some of the walls were built as a young man when it was necessary to try to protect myself from those trying to hurt me, or at least those I perceived as trying to hurt me.  These walls are ugly, not well constructed and they don't need to be there.  They need to come down, at least what is left of them.  They're not as tall as they used to be and they really don't serve any useful function because they couldn't keep a rabbit out of the courtyard of my life.  But still, the remnants of those walls are there, scaring the landscape of my life.

Then as I take a further look, I see walls I've intentionally built over the  years that were part of the same mindset I had as a youth.  These were walls I built to keep people away from seeing the courtyard of my life.  When I look at these walls, the first thing I notice is there is no symmetry to them.  They are not well thought out,  being built with no thought of the total structure of my home.  They're just random walls.  How ugly!  These puppies must go!!!!!

So  as I sit in my courtyard looking around, I notice the sun is high in the sky, well past noon.  If I don't get these walls taken care of,  it will be dark soon and I won't have a chance to rebuild a useful and beautiful structure.  I smile as I think of the work ahead.  I want to build a beautiful structure so when I'm gone, and people look at it, they will enjoy what they saw.  But it's obvious from the efforts I've put forth to  build what I have, that I don't know squat about building walls!  I'm going to need help.

As I think about this further, I remember that someone told me about a carpenter that is really good at building beautiful structures.  Now what was His name?????